It’s no secret I love men. I always have. In second grade I had a crush on Geoff Montgomery. In fifth grade I loved loved loved John Taylor from Duran Duran (Who am I kidding, I still do!). Some boys have touched my heart, some have made me bitter. Some men are real jerks, some are totally awesome. But there is one thing that all of you have in common…you are the biggest babies when you are sick! At the current moment, I’m addressing the ol’ man. Now, I fully understand that colds suck. I am aware that when one has trouble breathing, it can make you a little cranky, and I agree. I do not agree however, that you are able to take 3 days off from life because you have the freaking sniffles. Women don’t really get that luxury. We are required by law, at least I’m pretty sure it’s by law, that we keep going. The dishes, cooking, laundry, going to work all still need to be done by us. And heaven forbid, seriously, that you would actually help if we were sick enough to need it. Silly us, all of those things are still waiting for us to do at the end of the day, sick or not.
I love you to pieces. I really do. With all of my heart, I can assure you that you are NOT dying. I’ve watched people die. Hell, I watched my mother die. I promise, you will make it through this crisis the medical professionals label the common cold. And when your generosity passes this horrendous medical condition to me..so will I. All while functioning at full speed.